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I Have Endometriosis, How Can I Talk to my Partner about it?

by | Posted on March 20, 2021

I Have Endometriosis, How Can I Talk to my Partner about it?

You may find it difficult to talk about something as personal as endometriosis with your partner. However, communication is key to allow your partner to learn about the condition, its challenges, and the ways to manage it.

Why you might find it difficult to talk to your partner

If you are at the beginning of a new relationship, you may be scared of changing or losing the relationship if you reveal the fact that you have endometriosis. You may feel that you have to be in a solid and serious relationship before talking about your condition.

If you are already in a serious relationship, you may hesitate to tell your partner that sex is painful. You may worry that you are going to hurt their feelings or lose them [1].

Why is it important to talk to your partner?

It is perfectly natural to have concerns about talking about your condition with your partner. However, doing so can actually bring you closer and strengthen your relationship.

Once they know about your symptoms, your partner can be more understanding and supportive. They will know for example why you may be avoiding intercourse. This way, you may explore new ways of being intimate.

Tips to help you communicate with your partner

Here are some tips to help you better communicate with your partner if you have endometriosis.

Learn about your condition

Learning and making yourself familiar with endometriosis is the key. The more you know, the better you will be able to answer any queries your partner may have about the disease and its impact.

You can educate yourself through reliable websites dedicated to patients with endometriosis. For example, the Endometriosis Foundation of America provides a wealth of information about the condition and its treatment [2]. There is also the Endonews website and newsletter where you can read news stories about research in endometriosis and emerging new treatments [3].

Your doctor can also provide important information such as whether or not your condition affects your fertility and the treatments that they recommend.

Choose the right environment to speak

You may find it difficult to start the conversation. In order to effectively convey your feelings, choose a time and place that suits you both. Opt for a quiet place free from distractions where you can interact calmly.

Be honest

Open and honest communication between you and your partner is key so that you are both able to convey and understand each other’s feelings, needs, and wants.

Let your partner know how endometriosis symptoms such as pain, fatigue, and heavy bleeding may affect your relationship with them.

Be supportive

Research has shown that endometriosis has a significant impact on the patient’s partner in terms of day‐to‐day living, finances, sex life, and the overall relationship [4].

Therefore, it is important that you make an effort to also listen to your partner, answer their questions, offer support and show them that you acknowledge how they feel. This will not only make the situation less stressful but also allow you to explore possible solutions to overcome existing issues.

Exploring solutions

Once you and your partner are more comfortable talking about each other’s feelings and problems openly, it will be easier for you to explore practical solutions.

Perhaps you could stay in and watch movies instead of going out when your symptoms are worse. Or you could consider a massage, gently touching, or oral sex when intercourse would be more painful.

Seeking psychological help or counseling can help when you feel emotionally drained. Sexual therapy or couples therapy may also be beneficial [5].

In cases when no solution is available, it can help to change your way of thinking or to look from a different perspective. In the long run, thinking positively and being optimistic can help you and your partner to stay strong [6].


  1. We Asked, You Answered: What's It Like Dating With Endometriosis?,
  2. Endometriosis Foundation of America
  3. Endonews
  4. Exploring the impact of endometriosis on partners, The Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology Research
  5. A systematic review on the effects of endometriosis on sexuality and couple’s relationship, Facts, Views & Vision in ObGyn
  6. Endometriosis and Couples, Endometriosis UK

Ready for a Consultation?

Our endometriosis specialists are dedicated to providing patients with expert care. Whether you have been diagnosed or are looking to find a doctor, they are ready to help.

Our office is located on 872 Fifth Avenue New York, NY 10065.
You may call us at (646) 960-3080 or have your case reviewed by clicking here.

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